I wrote something!!!

It's been months and months and months since I wrote something and it felt good to do it. Excuse the profanity.

E and I were on the highway for about half an hour. The seal in my backseat was still broken, so it sounded as if the door wasn't closed, even though it was. The faster I went, the louder the sound of the wind was. The whistling of it irritated the hell out of me, but I needed to get away from the asshole truck driver behind me. The sun was beating down on my thighs, but of course my AC was broken. I mean, why wouldn't it be? Every time I tried to make myself a little more comfortable in my seat, the leather burned my skin, so I stayed my ass in the same nasty, sweaty spot I was in. When the truck driver behind me honked, I grabbed the window handle to roll the window down and stuck my finger outside. I was staring out of my rear view the entire time. He swerved in the next lane without even checking his mirrors and raced past me displaying the same gesture.

"Asshole. And you! Can you get your sweaty pigs off my fucking car?"
"I'm trying to stay comfortable!" E said. "It's blazing in here. Can you at least leave your window down?"
"No! It tangles my hair. Be comfortable with some socks on. I'll even take mine off for you."
"There's a reason I don't wear or own socks."
"Your philosophy of socks being feet jail is bogus, especially when your feet are STILL on my dash. Get them off or I'm turning around!"
"Bullshit you're turning around. Take the next exit then ride it 'til you see Elizabeth Hill Road."

We were on our way to the Lincoln Rocks right outside of Sumpter. I had never been to the Rocks, but E used to go there all the time when she was still heavy drinking. I'm really only going because I know it'll make her feel better. E's quit drinking, but her mom still won't even look at her.

"Right here. Make this right."

The road was a little curvy, but it wasn't long at all until we were watching the purple and orange sky. We sat at the rocks for maybe an hour or so just looking, not talking. I was thinking about Derek and how my mom barely comes home anymore. Who knows where she could be going for days at a time? She doesn't work and I don't think she has friends. I know for sure she has no family, except for her sister Debby, who hates her because my mom slept with her husband. That was when my mom first found out Derek was using. All my dad does is deal with problems the only way he knows how, sitting on the living room couch, watching Jeopardy. I used to think it was sad, but I'm used to it now. When he found out about Derek, he would just drink until the morning, but once he found out about my mom cheating on him, he just shut down completely.

"Do you ever miss Derek?" E asked me.
"I don't know. He hadn't really been around too much since we were kids. Why?"
"I don't know... I miss my mom."
"That's different, you know?" Derek killed himself in his cell a few months ago.
"I know, but still..."
"What are you gonna do about your mom?"
"I don't know... What about you?"
"I don't know."

What was your favorite Robin Williams movie?

Today has been a terrible, terrible day for me. If you haven't heard the news, Robin Williams passed on earlier today. I have yet been able to address the subject without bursting into tears.

Jumanji, Mrs. Doubtfire, Flubber, Aladdin, Hook, Happy Feet

Robin Williams was a huge part of my childhood and his death hit me very hard, but (as with all deaths) we must celebrate the cheerfulness Mr. Williams brought us. He gave us all the kind of laughs that made us tear up and out stomachs hurt.

If I had to pick, I'd say Aladdin is my favorite Williams movie. His songs were the best on the soundtrack.  Honestly, I still can't watch Jumanji and I consider it one of the scariest movies I've ever seen (I clearly haven't seen many). Mrs. Doubtfire. My goodness, the number of times I watched Mrs. Doubtfire in homeschool as a child and I'm sure most of us have the lines memorized by now.

I don't really have a point to this post, but I couldn't not put something.
Mr. William's legacy will go on and my deepest condolences go out to his family and loved ones.

What's your favorite Robin Williams movie?
-mad

Project Runway Season 13 Episode 2: MITCHELL SHOULD HAVE WON

This week was amazing! The designers (well, most of them) did amazing this week! As a film major, I loved this challenge. It was fun and it really challenged the designers to think outside of just 'the movies'. Before we get into the runway, let me just express how much I loooove Sandhya! Her attitude and ideas are amazing. I'm so super sick of everyone picking on her because she's different. What these people need to get through their skulls is that fashion isn't just about 1 idea, 1 designer, or 1 brand. There is a whole world to fashion and they need to stop being so close minded. Sandhya is a great designer and she handles herself with peace and grace, unlike most of the others picking on her.

Angela... Angela, Angela, Angela... She dodged the judges big time, this week. She's lucky she had the team that she had. I was convinced she was going home. She needs to calm down and be more creative! The clothing she brought at the audition was cute, but I'm getting sick of looking at her Forever 21 looking clothes. We've seen it already. She needs to listen to the other designers, break some rules, and get inspired!

Now, the runway!

REALLY QUICK PROJECT RUNWAY POST!!!

Project Runway started up last week? This season is going to be an interesting one.

I wish I had this idea sooner, but it's only Week 2. Basically, I'm going to rave on every week about recent episodes.

Really fast (wish I had time to provide pictures of the designers and their work--promise to do it for the next post!!!):

#1: Why is Amanda back? Why, why, why, why, WHY?!?! Ugh.

I'm loving Angela, Carrie, Emily, Korina (love her work--NOT her attitude. Keep your nose out of other people's pie. Focus on your own work, love.), Kristine, Samantha, Sean, and Sandhya (love her use of color and, something I rarely see in fashion, HER MESSAGE!).

This is a super disorganized post--I'm not even going to proofread it, but who do you all love this season? Who do you think will make it to fashion week? I'd love to hear it!

xx
-mad

Je suis une femme et je mange une orange.

"As for the French language, it's probably one of the most beautiful in the world. I speak a little bit and I can follow conversations, but I think it will take time to improve myself." -Charlene, Princess of Monaco

My title says, "I am a woman and I am eating an orange."

This is about as much I can contribute to a conversation in French, but still HOW AWESOME IS THAT?! I'm actually pretty proud of the progress I've been making learning French using the app and website Duolingo. I do want to be a fluent French speaking and I know, of course, I won't get there using an iPhone app. I've been brainstorming ways a broke college student could do such a thing, but I'm determined! Totally wishing I could minor in French, but starting either Spring 2015 or Fall 2015, I'll be minoring in psychology. It's a very strategic career move. (Honk if you got my Grease reference!)

 In other news: Orientation is tomorrow! (Or today. It's 12:15am right now--and I have to be up in 5 hours. Woo!) Super excited to meet new people and completely 100% ready to get the heck out of this town!

So, as I said, I must be up in 5 hours. Gotta hit the hay.

See y'all l8r!
-mad

Whoa, who are you?

Hi.

I'm here.

Alive.

"Everything of importance has been said before..." -Alfred North Whitehead

I started reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. Only bits. I'm in a very writey mood today. I want to talk, talk, talk. I don't know why. Probably because I've been keeping so much in recently. Something happened today that's got me frightened and longing for change. I've got a lot to work on. I'm terrible at coping with stress, anger, and basically any uproar of emotions. I always say "I'm working on me,  I'm working on me," but I'm really not. I seek immediate satisfaction and it's bullshit to say the least and it isn't sliding anymore. A lot of my "journey" will be logged through a private diary-like blog, but I want to get back into the spin of things and dedicate this blog to things that make me happy.

...

This is such a weird ending but I don't know what to say.
LOL

Toodaloo!

Most Inspirational Pins!

"Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!" -Audrey Hepburn

Hello there! How is everyone?! It's officially summer. How awesome is that? The sun is out and it's a time for relaxing. I've been thinking about how much in love I am with my inspiration board on Pinterest (click here to see it!). It's filled with words and photos that I love and anything that inspires me to keep on bein' me! I picked out 4 of my favorite quotes/sayings in the board to share with y'all. I hope you all enjoy!

HEY! Hot weather=hot tempers. And no matter what the weather is, there are always going to be people with nasty vibes. You can't change them, so it's now YOUR JOB to make sure YOU are the one oozing with positivity and it'll rub off.

This is such a cliche, buuuut... how can someone love you if you don't love yourself??!!!? You should never ever never ever EVER NEVER EVER rely on someone else to make you happy. You're just asking for a shredded heart. You come first, so you make sure that you are happy and especially before getting into any relationships.

What I have to say on this matter is very short, but it is probably one of the most important quotes in this post:

You cannot control another person's thoughts, feelings, or actions. You can only control yours and don't let anyone take that from you. You are in control. Period.

I LIVE BY THIS!! Let the small things go. When an issue comes up, something that's really got you boiling, think about it! Will this matter  year from now? You'll be surprised how many times the answer to this question is a flat NO!

Thank you for letting me share these with you guys. Again, there's a lot more (and even more to come) on my 'inspiration' board.

I'll see you guys later!

-mad